Me.Not. A. Good. Bro (& Everything)

I am not a good brother..
I didn't even attempt to talk to him...
What I want is only peace...
but what I do is only ignore him...
Whenever he talks to me, I am just reply him and that's all...
It's not that I don't want to care,
its just something I can't help to forgive him...
I can't forgive his attitude, his personality..
I understand everyone has different personalities,
but I still can't accept it.
What should I do?
I just want us to be good siblings!
But it is much more harder than I thought it will be...

I admit I am not a good son, good sibling, good relative, good friend to others too. I knew my weaknesses, my dominating personality, my "not understanding others' feelings" behavior. Sigh...I just wish I can change, I want to change, I really want everything to be good. But, I really need some time and guidance...

I know I should think positively, but I just can't this sudden arising EMO feeling, I cried, cried out all of my guilt,my sad feeling..

In the car...
Me: Not going to watch movie 2nite, will be watching 2moro coz no cannot buy ticket edy.
Bro: *Disappointed*
Me: You can watch movie 2moro or not?
Bro: Erm...dunno, maybe will go out with my friends 2moro.
Me: If you can''t go then buy 3 tickets, if you plan to watch then buy 4 tickets.
Bro: Huh? Why 3? Who are the 3?
Me: Dad, Mum, eldest sis...
Bro: What about you?
Me: I am going back to KL 2moro edy..
Bro: So fast??
Me: Ya!!!

And I think we have nothing much to communicate and share although I am going back to KL 2moro edy...I am really an useless bro..sorry...

CNY Day 1

This Year CNY is quite boring for me, lol. Dunno why?? Hmm...bascially just stay at home the whole day, sleep the whole afternoon, really swt. Went to temple for a while in the morning, then at night went to Jiun Sheng's new house for his birthday celebration. Didn't eat anything there because I was vegetarian on that day and they were doing BBQ food. Was gambling in his house and in the end won RM2, haha! Leave JS's house at about 11.45pm and went to Senso Hilton to have a drink. Ordered Midori, nice nice!! There were performances there with all popular songs-Lady Gaga, BEP, lol...We were challenging each other Truth or Dare...It was quite a good night la.

I want Running as my Motivator

Target: 1/2 Marathon in 2 Hours!!!!

New Year =New Look

Hey, I have dyed my hair!!!
My sis said I look like a gangster, do I??

 

Gangster??

Well, I guess there is also another side of me who do not agree with that, see this picture then you will know.

 

Lala?? Lol!

So guys, how is my new hair color?? So you guys prefer Gangster or Lala?? Lol.

My Goals

Everyone has their own dreams, and I am sure that we all have different ways of chasing after our dreams, We all move at different speeds, different time. I really hope that I can achieve these dreams, as I am not doing it alone.  :-)

My Goals

1^st Goal: Achieve at least an A- for Summative!!!!!

               Achieve at least a B+ for EOS 5!!!!

Reward: Can go for KK trip!!! @?? ________

Punishment: no shopping, movie, and pool for 2 weeks

2^nd Goal: Earn at least RM6000 in a year (starting June 2010)

Reward: Get a new HP

Punishment: no pps and facebook for 2 weeks

3^rd Goal: Run half marathon (21.6km) in 2 hours

Reward: Get a new shoe (Nike Basketball Shoe/ running shoe)

Punishment: no meat n junk food (including 100 plus/revive) for 2 weeks

Be Happy Ler...

I am really sien of all the things.

Sometimes understanding is the key of everything.

And everything is as normal as always, nothing is complicated, seriously I dunno how also.

I am sure that nothing is wrong, just that precipitating factors make it wrong?

Well, I have nothing else to comment, and I don't think anything is wrong..

Maybe it can be more perfect, or maybe I am just always a loser?

I dunno but seriously I dunno what to do?

I just want to be happy always, I seriously don't want to have any emo attitude, not even a little bit..

I just want to be HaPpy and live meaningfully!!! Can I???

Greeting 2010's 1st Emo Post

Hi, everyone, I am back...

Lol, this is my 2010's first post,have been too lazy to update my blog...

Haih, nothing much to write about, just feel that I am not as happy as before when I am in Vista...

Last time back Vista can chat with friends, hang out with friends...

But now it seems that someone has misunderstood something and doesn't really want to communicate..

Everyday also EMO face, well, I guess I can't help it right??

I am really very tired right now, my timetable is damn packed for everyday, sien...

Looking forward for the next weekend, hope it will cheer me up!!!

Starting to feel wanna go back to my hometown again...........4 Feb, it will reach real soon....

 Nothing to say.....well, people's attitude really hard to be changed, isn't it???

And no one will understand me either.......a very sad case :-(

Top 5 Biggest Constellation???

 I am always interested in Astronomy....hehe. I bought a book to study about stars and constellation!!


The real number of constellation is actually 88, not 12. They are even be positioned according to their sizes.U want to know what are the top 5 biggest constellation?

No.1: Hydra (The Water Snake)

No.2: Virgo (The Maiden)

No.3: Ursa Major (The Great Bear)

No.4: Cetus (The Whale)

No.5: Hercules (Hercules)

3rd Day of Posting

Today I reached clinic later than the day before, I called the nurse to ask her to inform the doctor that I was stucked in traffic jam, lol! Lucky me! Hmm...2day saw 32 cases in the morning and 14 cases in the evening. I went out to have brief history taking session with 2 patients before the doctor come,lol. Today the doctor used a lot of equipments including ultrasound for fibroid scanning, ECG to detect any heart abnormalities, nebuliser for asthma aggravated by URTI case, stitching and nail removing for accident case, attempt to remove foreign body which entered the eye. Hehe....so many different cases today....tomorrow is my last day of posting....lalala, will miss the time of learning with doctors and nurses, but not the fact that I have to wake up early! :-(

2nd Day of Posting

Reached clinic at about 8.10am, hehe, the doctor just reached a while before me. Today there were 30 cases in the morning and 15 cases in the afternoon. A lot of familiar faces today because there were few same people who were coming back for follow up. This includes an old woman the day before who has to come back to change her dressing. A lot of medical check up tests today. And I saw 2 familiar faces-Sebuyau people today. Heard from them that there are dengue/ chikungunya outbreak in Sebuyau right now. Now the fogging activity is carried out in Sebuyau. And today managed to ask the family history from a patient with hypertension. Visited the dispensary counter with all the drugs, forgot all my pharmacology knowledge already, haih........

p/s: 2 more days to go..........and 2009 also 2 more days to be gone!!!

      I am wishing 2010 will be a great year for me, u, and everyone!!!!!

     I will be going back to Sebuyau on 1/1/2010, but before that must have a party at home (New Year's Eve) with family!!!!